Category: Step Children

Making Her House My Home: How To

In my teenage years and through college, I had a pretty clear vision for what my first home was going to be. I was imagining a small apartment or a little townhouse, something in a big bustling city with very little square footage. What I was not expecting was a 4 bedroom, 2 bathroom house partially attached to a restaurant in a part of Pennsylvania that I had never visited let alone wanted to live in. Oh, and to make matters worse, it was the house my husband shared with his ex-wife and their children. Talk about an interesting start to marriage and my new family. 

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Loving the “Un-Loveable” Through Divorce and Custody

My first experience as a mom was when I became a step-mom!

When I married my husband, I became a step-mother to three children. During that time in our lives, custody was a scary subject. Both sides of the divorce were still living in chaos, trying to pursue healing, and create a new normal. It definitely took a toll on the kids. The greatest heartbreak, in my opinion, was the 2 1/2-year-old that was stuck in the middle. She had no idea what it was like to have both parents living under the same roof and, to her, chaos was a normal part of life.

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Stepkids Are Not Accidents

When I first joined the family, my stepdaughter shared with me that she was “an accident.”  As a believer, I am acutely aware that our words have the power of life and death (Proverbs 18:21).  I realized that she must have overheard an adult conversation, and it hurt to know that these words were spoken over her.

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Can We Have A Custody Re-do?

As of today, we are coming up on three years of custody stuff, and I finally feel like I’m allowing myself to begin the healing process. Oh, if only I could do it over again with what I am learning now, things would be much different. If you find yourself along for a similar ride, let me give you a few helpful ways to cope with a custody battle, that I learned after the fact:

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Lessons Learned in the Court Battle

My stepson is a Leukemia survivor, and within a few months of being diagnosed, the Make-A-Wish Foundation awarded him a trip to see “real” castles in England.  Naturally, we wanted his big sister to share this once in a lifetime experience, and my husband approached her mom (different mom than my stepson) about getting my stepdaughter a passport.  She refused to give permission for the passport or the trip, and we sought the help of a lawyer.

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